From the crib to a toddler bed

When it comes to transitioning from the crib to a toddler bed, two inevitable questions come to mind: When and How? There isn't exactly a magic formula, but the transition will certainly be easier if the child already sleeps through the night independently.

A well-rested child capable of falling asleep on their own is much less likely to wander out of the room at night, which is the major issue parents face when moving their children from the crib.

The timing of the transition depends on the child's level of motor and psychological development. Parents can tell it's time when the child can easily get out of the crib without falling. Another factor that might anticipate this change is the arrival of a sibling. Often, for logistical reasons, parents need to move the child to a big bed to free up the crib for the new baby.

If you are about to start sleep training, there will be an adjustment period as the child learns to fall asleep independently. Therefore, during this period, it is essential to keep the environment unchanged (the same crib, the same stuffed animal, the same sheets, the same room, etc.). Thus, this is not the ideal time to transition to the toddler bed.

Assuming your child is already falling asleep on their own and sleeping through the night or, for some reason, you want to move them from the crib to a toddler bed, there are some steps to consider.

The first step is preparation. It's important to explain to your little one what is happening. Tell them they are moving to the new bed, pick a day, and let them know when the change will happen. Remember to explain to your child what's happening positively, without turning the occasion into something monumental, to avoid creating unnecessary pressure.

Another crucial point is involving the child in the entire change process. You can take your child with you to choose the bed, sheets, and pillows they prefer, etc. This will not only ensure they receive something they like but also help develop a sense of ownership of their new bed, significantly easing the transition.

If possible, try to place the bed in the same spot where the crib used to be. In fact, you will want to keep everything else in your child's room pretty much the same, except for the new bed. This is already a big change for your child, so don't try to make any additional unnecessary changes.

This doubles for the bedtime routine and schedule on the big night. When getting your child ready for bed on that first night, don't change the routine, don't change the bedtime, don't try to give them a new food for dinner, etc. Keep everything as predictable as possible.

In addition to maintaining regular sleep routines, it's crucial to ensure that the transition to the toddler bed doesn't coincide with other significant milestones in your child's life, such as the arrival of a sibling, toilet training, starting daycare, etc.

Again, you don't need to make a big fuss about this event. Tell your child that you're proud of them, but try to avoid comments like, "You're a big kid now!" Children are typically in a perpetual state of uncertainty about whether or not they want to go through this whole "growing up" thing, and we want to keep things as low-key as possible. So, now that your child is tucked in and the lights are out, there are a few different scenarios that might unfold:

The child immediately adjusts to the new bed and doesn't try to test the rules in any way (e.g., getting up in the middle of the night). If this is the case for your child, then you are among the lucky minority!

The child seems to adapt immediately but, after a week or two, starts getting up and coming to the parents, or playing with their toys, or calling mom to return several times during the night.

The child starts doing all these things on the first night.

The solution for these latter two situations is the same. Issue a warning when your child shows uncooperative behavior, tell them what the consequence will be if they do it again, and then apply that consequence if and when they repeat it.

You likely have already discovered a consequence that works for your child, and I strongly suggest you stick with it. Again, we don't want anything to change except the bed, so keep doing what you've been doing regarding behavior management.

In case you haven't found an effective consequence yet, taking away their "sleeping buddy" or closing the door for a short period are both quite functional consequences without sending your child into hysteria. For each repeat of the undesirable behavior, extend the time the door remains closed or withhold the "sleeping buddy" for a few more minutes.

Remember, always explain what's happening, keep things light, set expectations, and enforce the rules. It won't always be easy, but it's quite simple.

One last thought to keep in mind... As much as you try to make this transition as smooth as possible, it's almost a mathematical certainty that your little one will try to break the rules. They will likely come out of their room a lot, call for you, ask for a glass of water, or say they want to go back to sleep in their crib.

It's crucial to stay firm every step of the way, especially during the first few weeks. If you start letting the rules be broken, allowing them to climb into bed with you, or letting them go back to the crib, this process will continue for months.

So, stay calm and apply the rules firmly and consistently. All of this, combined with the sense of security you convey to your child regarding the new bed, will help them adapt sooner and more easily.